I often find it weird or unusual to call myself a blogger. When someone talks to me about my writing, I feel partly embarrassed because honestly, it can feel silly to be vulnerable with an unknown audience. You read my stuff? You think it’s good? Really?
I started writing consistently when I was in high school. I always journaled, if you could call my recollections of every detail of my day “journaling”, when I was a teenager. Until the moment when Jesus rocked me forth into this challenge, I wrote for no one and for unknown reasons. It saved me on days when my mind felt overwhelmed by new motherhood. It brought me back to life when I was discouraged. It plunged me into Jesus when I didn’t know how to find Him.
So why do I write? Why do I sometimes go a couple of weeks without a word? (Sorry about that, if you’ve been expecting something from me) Why this?
Who has ever given to God that God should repay him? For from him and through him and to him are all things.
I wrote an essay when I was a junior in high school that received feedback that I will carry with me forever. It was a raw piece of writing, not a research paper, mind you. The notes at the end of it from the reader told me that I was gifted, that this was something great, and that I had written one of the best essays he had ever read. I still carry it in my wallet, folded up and hidden among all the other junk that collects in there.
I don’t have a game plan for blogging, I don’t have an end goal when it comes to writing. And I can never give enough back to God for all that He has given me, but I will sure try. I am not consistent, but that’s also not how I work.
Why this? Because of Jesus. Janelle, that doesn’t make sense to me. That’s the goodness of it. There’s a crazy number of moments in my life that lead up to this, whispers of callings in my soul. It’s God bringing to life my crazy, crazy dreams and giving them a name. I’m not really a blogger, I don’t think. I’m a dreamer who longs only to soak in the greatness of Jesus. He saves me. He gave me this. And I want to give it back to Him.
Although I don’t consider myself a blogger, this is, technically, a blog (funny how that works)! What interests you, friend? Anything you want me to write about? Let me hear it!