Last night we were driving around our city looking at houses. We like to dream about what the future holds for us, and sometimes that involves looking at houses we can’t move into. I mean, why not, right? We had just finished up at Target, it was only 7:30, and we needed to kill time before our boys would go to bed (it was one of those days). We drove by a house that I remember being built when I was younger. Today there are trees tall enough to shield the house from the road, trees that were planted shortly after the house was erected.
Trees are slow growers. Some grow faster, but they don’t become mammoth-sized plants overnight. It takes a lot of rain, sunshine.
I was looking at those trees shielding that house and thought the owners probably didn’t notice right away how big they had gotten. As if one day they noticed the shade covering their windows, the view protected by the greenery. One day, those little trees were huge.
Last night I had a serious fit of fear. If you’ve been following this blog or our story for long enough, you’ve read about the struggle it is to have a small business with three children. I doubted God 100%. I felt certain this was just all wrong solely because I couldn’t see the fruit of it all. I couldn’t see how God was going to make this bigger.
Here’s what I know: God promised this to us from the beginning. He told me Evan would be freelance, and that He would provide. I’ve seen Him fulfill that. I also know that He is capable of growing it like a tree. And I am confident of His plans.
God doesn’t give me imagery for no reason. We drove by that house last night just so I could see those big, beautiful trees and think of what is to come. How only He can grow something so organically over time, that soon enough it will click, we will see just how big He has grown a business simply because He can. Sometimes I hope and expect an overnight transformation. But He didn’t promise me that.
I have to keep repeating truth, speak truth over fear, and give Him room to grow me. He always does. Our faith can be like a tree too. It doesn’t become monumental so quickly. It takes time. And that gives me hope, peace even. To know that it will come with time, that He will make a way for me to see Him better.
Thank You for all You give us, Papa.