What a Mom Wants

I’m preaching to myself today as much as anyone else. This week has been rough, despite the great celebrations of my son’s first birthday and the discovery of a third boy entering our family soon. But guys, let’s be real, the devil never rests, so I’m speaking Truth a little louder for you & for myself.

I will become a mom of three boys in March. Three boys. Three. I am coaching myself through it, feeling relieved that although a girl would’ve been amazing, I can now breathe a little easier knowing I have done this two times already.

But before I step out into the confidence that I wish I could say I felt, I am sinking deeper into doubt. Parenting is rough. Being a mom is a servant’s job some days, other days the most rewarding experience of all. At the sound of the “I love you’s” and the sweet slobbery kisses, I know I am loved. But I also know that I am tired, I am on my knees, and I am praying for grace over and over and over.Continue reading “What a Mom Wants”

Disconnecting + Connecting

We celebrated my son’s first birthday this weekend. It was glorious, exhausting, and full of so much joy. And I didn’t take a single picture of it.

I also spent my weekend with my phone away from me, not attached to the palm of my hand, ignored and forgotten. Nothing deserves some neglect more than social media sometimes. And that also meant neglecting Soul Strings, for only just a moment.Continue reading “Disconnecting + Connecting”

Community: Me vs. The World

I’ve been talking about community over the past few weeks because it’s difficult for me. I had a strong community when I was younger, but once life became filled with kids and work and stress, I ignored the need for community. It’s easy to overlook. It’s difficult to return.

So, I’m gonna hit on a few questions, concerns, lies that I tell myself and what Truth really is.Continue reading “Community: Me vs. The World”

Coming Back to Community

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about community; what it means, how I struggle with it, and how I want to become better at being “community minded”. But you know what’s difficult about it? Beyond the awkward stages of learning about others, being vulnerable, and being intentional, there’s a certain amount of trust that has to develop. A faith that being real with people, who may or may not (but hopefully!) accept you, and that you can reciprocate it.Continue reading “Coming Back to Community”

Community: Does It Matter?

I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for two and half years. It’s not exactly a luxurious job. There are lonely days, secluded days, tear-laden days. But also, joyful, wonderful, hopeful days.

I’ve been reading a new blog recently that has challenged me a lot. The Tapestry is currently doing a series of 31 Days of Exploring Community, something that I didn’t think I even needed to think about, let alone read. But with each new post, I’m convicted.Continue reading “Community: Does It Matter?”

Twenty-four

Two days from now, I’ll be 24. I love birthdays, I love celebrating other people’s’ birthdays. But this year…whoosh.

This year I am 24, pregnant on my birthday (again, for the third time), two kids in tow, not even married four years, starting a small business, feeling kind of crazy. Don’t get me wrong, I am happier than I’ve ever been. But I’m also more exhausted than I’ve ever been. We’ve got crazy stuff going on, although it is good, grace-filled crazy. Being a mom on top of everything else is like conducting an orchestra. I don’t even know what that’s like, but that’s exactly the point. I have no idea what motherhood is supposed to look like.Continue reading “Twenty-four”